Koi Ponds And Naughty Profiles

You know, on Twitter we ought to get the girls with their naughty profiles together with the guys selling koi fish ponds, a partnership.

Then whatever naughtiness the girls are engaging in, they have the beauty of a good koi fish pond in the background. It'd soften it, pretty.

Given the two, I'd probably look at the girls, but I'd rather BE with the fish. I know the fish haven't been out fooling around.

I'm in a follower race with a guy on Twitter named RatRaceTrap. Currently I have 4 and he has 13083 (seriously). He's getting complacent.

It'd be interesting to know how many of his 13083 followers sell koi ponds or have naughty profiles. I would guess he's going for numbers.

But say you had 13083 followers and you decided to prune them out. After the first week of constant work, you'd just forget it.

As soon as I do any project that involves thousands of whatever, I start figuring it out...if it takes me 34 seconds for each one, that's...

He's running a lot of quotes. That must be a life, poring over books all day looking for inspirational stuff. Good old Churchill and others.

One from today: "If we are together nothing is impossible..." Ho hum. Or "Things get worse before they get better." Tired stuff.

No offense to him. He's not saying it. These guys from the past, good for nothing but the quotes they first Twittered back then, said it!

I like the quotes by "Unknown," who I guess I could claim to be. "To get what you've never had, you must do what you've never done."

"To get what I've never had." I've never had syphilis. "You must do what you've never done." Ignore the koi ponds, turn to the girls? Ha ha.

I'm writing a book here. How come no one else jumps in? Am I the only one with something on my mind? Oh, right, it's an empty warehouse.

Abstinence

Who would win in a fight, Bristol Palin or Derek the Abstinence Clown?

I saw part of Derek's presentation the other day. He's a very good juggler, and can even juggle machetes, if I'm remembering it right, but he wisely doesn't want to juggle them over someone's head because he might drop them. That's smart. Except I'd be smart enough not to volunteer to be the guy under the machetes! No one would make an object lesson out of me because I wouldn't be there! I'm cautious and there are things I wouldn't do.

It's an interesting subject. Bristol doesn't think it's realistic generally. And generally nature wins. But Derek thinks education makes a difference. And I guess we usually agree with that. Except education teaches us also that nature usually wins.

Sex in Space Inevitable

Here's an interesting article, Sex in space is inevitable, say experts.

It seems that with many more space missions planned, and some geared up to last quite a while, scientists are starting to give thought to the idea of sex between astronauts.

Someone who studies the psychological effects of long space missions, Jason Kring of Embry-Riddle Aeronautical University in Florida, says, “To say that astronauts are some superior beings who cannot have interests in any kind of sexual feelings for three years … I just don't buy it."

As for myself, I've never ever studied the psychological effects of long space missions, and I could've told you that! Three years? After three years the little green one-eyed women of Mars would look good. "Take me to your leader." "Hey, baby, let my leader fend for himself. Come to Poppa!"

The article goes on to say that space agencies are inclining more toward sending mixed crews of men and women in space. Studies suggest this is a good idea because of their better ability to perform tasks assigned to them. A NASA spokesperson said, "They're mission-oriented. They're very focused on the task at hand.” Right, for three years at a time, no hanky, no panky.

Kring, however, does see hanky panky a'brewin' and waves a cautionary flag, stating what any "armchair astronomer" might guess, that sexual frustration could ensue. Could ensue, as in would ensue. Kring again: "Human sexuality is a basic need and now you're trying to tell people, 'Hey for three years, you can't do that.' They're going to figure out a way to do it.”

The article from this point on gets unnecessarily graphic -- including something from a book that mighty truly be subtitled Cosmic Sutra, concerning "positions that might work during cosmic copulation, ranging from the modified missionary position to seated with 'interlocking Y legs'.

But we shall conclude before mentioning any of that.

Note: Spaceship graphic is by zerohdog at flickr.com

Beyond Shame

This is hilarious. Two of the most disgraced lawmakers in history in terms of sex scandals and violating their own marriage vows, Larry Craig and David Vitter, co-sponsoring the so-called "Marriage Protection Amendment."

You really have to admire the brashness, the courage. These losers would've been sent to Exile Island and shunned forever in a bygone era. And not that long ago they would've slunk off -- kind like Mark Foley -- never to be heard from again. But not today. They're very much "in your face," with zero shame.

The amendment, by the way, would amend the U.S. Constitution to prohibit homosexual marriage. We'll excuse Vitter here and train our focus on Larry Craig: That's right, we're looking right at you, Stupid.